When was the last time you said this to yourself and took action? It’s something I’ve said a number of times this week in some form or fashion. Whether it be to people I’m coaching, family, friends or even myself, we often need to be reminded that it’s ok to be bold and push ourselves.
Now I know that this is easier said than done for most of us. But even the most confident people at times won’t really challenge themselves as the confidence often comes from a place of comfort and security.
Maybe it’s the level of risk we’re willing to take versus the reward or impact of it not going well. Imagine if the impact of trying something, and it not going well, which result in a slight embarrassment. Your attitude to this risk will be quite different than if the potential outcome impacts your personal or financial health. That said, as I personally reflect, I feel that sometimes I will overthink those lower impact decisions more than the big ones. Maybe because they are more frequent or maybe it’s because I’m more comfortable in those big decisions (especially financial ones), in my case it’s probably the latter.
But personal growth and development doesn’t come from staying in a comfort zone, we need to be pushing beyond into something that can make us uncomfortable. How far you can or are willing to go is really a personal choice but is still a choice.
As I look back over this week, one of my coaching clients is suffering a little from an impact to his confidence due to changes happening in his organisation. Part of this comes from not feeling completely in control of what’s happening, but a big part being that he’s looking at the situation through a negative lens, rather than the opportunity it could bring. By reframing the situation, he feels a little more in control and able to move things forward with some confidence. In this case, the initial change isn’t a bold one, but is pushing him a little to do something that is not natural or comfortable to him. But as I said earlier, each person has a different tolerance level to risk and how far they are willing to push themselves. The size of the step you take doesn’t matter, it’s the fact that you’re moving forward that’s important.
Be not afraid of growing slowly, be only afraid of standing still – Chinese Proverb
On a personal level, someone very near and dear to me was struggling with needing to do a video recording of a song performance. Even though she is amazing when she performs, she doesn’t like to see herself on camera and struggles to watch things back, but worst it makes her not want to do it at all. The suggestion was to still do the recording, but just of her voice, not of her. This is still a challenge for her based on what she’s comfortable with, so out of her comfort zone, but not far enough to feel totally worried.
So when was the last time you challenged yourself to be bold and be confident in something? Whether it be pushing your training harder, taking on that presentation to others that you are worried about doing or even as small as showing your presence in a meeting....take a step, it won’t be as scary as it seems.